Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Here ...and ... gone......

I am too emotional to blog, as I go through what was supposed to be when Levi joined us.  I want to write all I feel.  Instead, I'm going to share my heart's cries, in this moment......

May the wringing of my hands and the gripping of my face, as I rock back and forth, not be for nothing.
May the shredding of my heart and dreams be a wake-up call to get new ones, real ones.
Please don't let me continue on a path that I am unaware of all the colors, all the smells, all the beauty - and the beauty in the pain.
Put a guard at my heart to only invest in that, which is precious, that which endures and has no value that can be tagged for generations to come. 
Give me courage to birth again, to birth from the spiritual, creative and physical dimensions.
Grant me strength and vision only work towards and for... You.
I am your vessel - have your way - purge me of self-pity.  GRACE GRACE from my eyes, from my lips, from my voice to draw those to you. 
I will not bargain with you...it will be how you want it.  Please fill me now - more please.

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